How to Pick a Pineapple

Sunday morning I found myself in the produce section of my Stop N Shop staring at some plums when I heard another distressed shopper over my shoulder.

"Excuse me! Sir?" she was talking to the kid who was restocking the berries, "How do you pick out a pineapple?" He stopped, walked over to her and mumbled something which led to her responding, "You don't know? Where is your produce man?"


I wondered to myself, Is there a "Produce Man" here? and finally settled on the plums I was taking home with me.

The woman continued to wonder aloud about her pineapple problem - about the color, the skin, about how she wanted to serve it that day. I looked over to her one more time as I was going, forgetting that with my eyesight, I was probably staring, squinting or focusing way too hard to be considered a casual glancer. "Do you know how to pick out a pineapple?"

Pineapple Pressure = Information Overload

Even without my 20/20 vision I was pretty certain she was talking to me. The pressure was now on: Do I know how to pick out a pineapple??

I was flustered, but I started rattling off whatever knowledge I had, " I feel like I heard something once about pulling out the leaves. If the leaves come out easily, then it's good. It sounds ridiculous, but that rings a bell for me-" [I just found two conflicting sources today - one that claims this is a myth, and another that uses this as its sole technique for picking pineapples!]


"But this green is no good, right?"

"No, I don't think so. It should look a little more yellow. You know, more pineapple-y," yep. I said that. "I also think you should be able to smell when it is ready to go. You said you want it for today? Then you need one that smells just right."

We proceeded to smell pineapples and noted that the green ones smelled like nothing and settled on one that smelled really delicious. She said, "Oh yeah, I can smell the difference! I think this is the one. Thank you so much!"

"No problem. I hope it is delicious!" I wanted to share more pineapple information with her. It seemed as though I had unleashed my internal pineapple database and had more to give, like

• store it upside down until you are ready to cut into it, that will help the sweetness flow to the whole fruit, or
• go through a step-by-step of what I consider the safe way to cut a pineapple.

But she didn't need any more of my help, so I was just left wondering: Where THE HECK did I learn all of this pineapple stuff??

My 21st Century Produce Man
 
There are some fruits and vegetables I know all about and others where I am still flustered. Of course, for any long-time readers of mine, it should come as no surprise that Jack Bishop has taught me quite a bit about picking out fresh produce in my favorite cookbook Vegetables Every Day. However, I did have some knowledge before that from my mother (that's where I got the upside down pineapple trick), my grandparents and other family members.

I have never encountered a produce man in any of the supermarkets I have shopped, but I also haven't looked for one either. There is a pretty simple reason for that, too. I tend to carry a produce man around in my pocket all day long! I have an iPhone and I can not tell you how often I refer to it when doing my shopping! I will use it to quickly check out whether or not a certain veggie is actually in season yet, how to pick out the perfect produce and to quickly scan any cool recipes to see if I need to pick up any additional ingredients.

I think it would be great to have an actual human being to talk to about these things, but in the meantime, I am happy I have found something to help me in my times of need!

Do you have a Produce Man that you confer with?

How do you pick out the perfect pineapple?

Where/How did you learn to pick out your produce?

How often do you use the Internet as your kitchen/food reference guide?

I Stopped and I Shopped and then... I Ate

Since my husband and I ate out most of our week off due to the deluge in our basement, this previous week was eventful in ways I thought my Easter/Passover break would have been. First, we finished the chicken breasts we had in the house, then we finished the Ahi Tuna steaks and we ran out of eggs and milk. I felt as though a weight was lifted. When I attempted to find something to eat Friday night, I was delighted by my struggle, but Saturday morning, though, I was frustrated. I feared I would not be able to find the replacement foods I needed due to my husband's recent infection from allergies gone wild - I was going to have to shop local and alone... was I just going to end up with the same stuff?

Well, before I even blogged yesterday, I decided we needed something to make it through these days of sparse food, in case I was less than successful, so I made a HUGE batch of marinara sauce (for my family's recipe, click here). I was inspired to do so when I saw what my husband had noshed on all day when I was at work on Friday: there was evidence of cereal, chips and salsa, yogurt and then he confessed to getting a Bacon egg and cheese sandwich in the morning. I was able to trace his eating pattern by the plates strewn all over the kitchen counter, in the sink and some, woefully, in the living room. However, this was all before his allergy medicine and he was therefore miserable and delirious, so all infractions are forgiven!

I then dilly-dallied for most of the day before buckling down to get to the store. Truth be told, I feared a repeat of my last shopping attempt... Finally, at around 6:15pm, my husband dropped me off at my local Stop n' Shop, a store I am not all too familiar with, but have always liked the organic foods aisle in. My goal for the trip: buy FRESH produce, organic when possible, check out the egg situation, see if this store carries Gardein and, finally, reacquaint myself with what is available in the organic foods aisle.

One day later and, after I have eaten, I can say that I feel satisfied with my first truly conscious food shopping (EVERY SINGLE ITEM was scrutinized before I placed it in my cart), but the process itself was quite a difficult one for me to take on alone. Perhaps I bit off more than I could chew (pun intended!) for a first go . Here were my major stumbling points:

1. Stop N' Shop is not "My" Grocery Store. I know "my" grocery store (a Waldbaums, recently turned King Kullen), like the back of my hand. I know their layout, I understand the flow of the store an intention of placement of items. I have been going there for so many years, I pretty much know where, in general to find all things, even if they are not things I normally buy because I know which aisle it would be in.

2. I still have pretty bad vision. Even though potassium has been helping me out in the energy department , it did not, miraculously return my vision to normal (unfortunately). For this reason, my extra careful scrutiny of items was an agonizing process of glasses on, glasses off, reading labels, reading ingredients, looking at prices, leaning over the mountains of potatoes, lemons, nectarines, bananas, mushrooms, tomatoes, etc. and deciphering: are these Organic? Some of this issues would have been solved if Stop N' Shop were "my" store - after 45 minutes in the produce section I finally discovered that organic produce has a large orange, curve sign above it (I almost wanted to cry when I saw that - there should be a grocery store KEY somewhere that tells you these things! I would have been through that section in 15 minutes!). Some of the issues would have been solved with another set of eyes!

The result of these two minor issues: the shopping trip took me a little over two hours and my organic aisle did not get the attention I had plan to give it due to (of course) a pretty damning headache that lasted until I finally fell asleep.

And yet, I still feel as though this trip was a great success. Here's why:

• I did it! If you have been following my blog, the fact that I actually made it out to the store, is a success in and of itself. In addition, the fact that I did it on my own is also pretty damn cool (even if it did suck me dry for the night!)
• I bought fresh (and mostly Organic). I always buy my fruit fresh, but I noticed over the years that I have been buying more and more of my vegetables frozen or canned. I don't know and/or remember what led to this transition, but so it goes. We actually have a second freezer in the basement and a full pantry. I was struck, at the end of this trip, when putting all of the items away, how I did not need to go downstairs with ONE item. The majority of my purchases went right in the refrigerator. I can't remember the last time that happened and it feels right. My freezer will still be used, of course, like tonight, when I put in all of the extra marinara sauce to be consumed at a later date.
• I found Gardein. I thought this would be a difficult item to find, but there, at the end of the produce section, is the refrigerated case, was the product Tal Ronnen wrote about in his cookbook The Conscious Cook, that I was so curious about. It is protein, made of soy (no GMOs), but not tofu and, he claimed had a texture so similar to meat that many people he had served it to did not even know the difference. I have toyed with tofu before, so I know how arduous it can be to get the texture "right." This Gardein piqued my curiosity (Gardein's website). There were three varieties in the store, I bought one of each!
• I learned my way around... a bit. If you spend two hours in a place, you get to know a little bit about it. I was no a complete stranger to Stop N' Shop before this trip, but I definitely feel a bit more comfortable about going back there again (and maybe next time STARTING off with the organics aisle, instead of ending off with it!).

Only time will tell if this was truly a success - can we eat the fresh food while it is still fresh? Did I buy too much for the week, or too little? What meals will come from these choices (although I had some in mind, I definitely have not planned them all out!)? Is this supermarket a viable option for healthy eating, or will I find something even better at the farmer's markets? And... the big question: Can we find the sustenance we need from these purchases considering I did not buy any meat?

Well, today was day 1, and while we did eat the chicken and the tuna steaks, there are still meat remnants in the house. Here's how our food day played out:

• Breakfast: We both ate our respective cereals. My husband also had a yogurt which he has been taking with his antibiotic.
• Lunch: My husband made a tuna fish sandwich and a salad. I could not resist - I had to try the Gardein (Sante Fe) with a salad. The Gardein was really, surprisingly good! I am still not completely sold on this product, as it is packaged and microwaved, but, it was delicious. I can absolutely understand how Tal Ronnen's dinner guests were fooled into thinking they were eating meat.
• Snack: We cracked open a box of organic, no wheat, gluten-free, dairy-free chocolate chunk cookies that were extra yummy!
• Dinner: Pasta with home-made marinara sauce and ricotta.

I don;t know if this is the healthiest day of food ever, but I can, at least say that some of yesterday's purchases have already gone to work!

Washed Away Dreams...

After I wrote my last blog, I woke up the next morning with a plan: I was going shopping! I waited for my husband to eat his breakfast and wipe the sleep from his eyes before I engaged him in one of my food conversations. It was raining Tuesday morning, so I wasn't sure that it would be the best day for a farm visit (I really want to look around when I get there if I can!), so this conversation was going to require some extra finesse - I wanted to negotiate TWO days of food shopping: Tuesday for Whole Foods and the Farmer's Market at the ferry and Wednesday for the farm trip. It took some negotiating, a quick glance at our whole vacation spread before us (we had exactly seven days left), a sketch of all of things each of us wanted to accomplish in that time, but it was agreed - we would go out to the Whole Foods in New Jersey, right over the bridge.

I opened my MacBook to search for the exact address and get directions when I heard it... a splash. I leaped up, "That's water," my heart was in my throat - what pipe just burst?! My husband said, "No, something just fell. RELAX." Unfortunately, we were both right - I heard a splash because my laundry bag, full of clothes (of course) fell into brown, smelly water that was at least 5 inches deep in our entire basement. Needless to say, we didn't make it to go Whole Foods, the Farmer's Market, nor have we fulfilled any of our vacation/free time desires. I'm sorry to say that the time in between was filled with ordering in and not eating very healthy either, but after you have been cleaning a basement filled with sewage, or dealing with the wreckage from it, the last thing you want to do is cook (and one is left wondering - should you be cooking like this??) So we ate pizza, sandwiches, more pizza, ordered from Better (a "healthy" take out place by us), but very little home-cooked food (one meal at my mother-in-law's?).

So, it's Monday again... I didn't mean for it to be exactly a week since my last post (I thought I would have SO much more to write about in the interim!), and I am going to attempt to go food shopping again, but we are shooting for today, and we are going local. I am going to go check out our Stop n Shop - I used t go there all of the time because of their great organic selection, but it was getting very expensive. I have heard the prices have gotten better, I guess I'll find out today. I also plan to cook tonight and, hopefully, continue to make a dent in the meat in our house, but I have to be realistic here: our home is still sort of like a funhouse. There is not much we can do about it since we have to wait for the insurance adjuster on Wednesday to see it as is, but it is hard to ignore and it is difficult to focus on anything else besides CLEAN UP CLEAN UP CLEAN UP! So wish me luck, that I can focus on all aspects of personal health: my internal as well as my external!